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Top ten warning signs you've entered a race for real Clydesdales...

10. Competitors are loaded into stalls before the start.
9. Hay in the transition area.
8. Event sponsors are Budweiser and Quaker Oats.
7. The race T-shirt comes in one size: XXXXXXXXXXXL and has FOUR arm holes.
6. A beer truck follows you on the bike and run.
5. Race numbers are applied with hot iron instead of magic marker .
4. Bike helmets are optional but blinders are not.
3. Someone offers to help you put on your footwear and he is holding a
hammer and nails.
2. There is a guy on your back and he starts hitting you with a crop during
the last half mile.

And the number one warning sing that you've entered a race for real

1. The competitor next to you falls, breaks their leg, and is
immediately shot in the head.


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Last modified: September 24, 2000