Word or Phrase in the NEW ENGLISH
or in other words "Euphemistic Bull Shit" |
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WHAT IS REALLY MEANT (DECODED)
or
Old and Correct English |
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ABUSER |
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Could be anyone from a hopeless skid row drunk to
a $1000.00 a day Heroin junkie addict, Child beater or a sexual pervert. |
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AGGRESSIVE
ACCOUNTING |
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A method of
accounting in which 2 + 2 never equals 4, but equals whatever is
needed to inflate the stock price. Used by any business
wishing to inflate its stock price and put money in the company
CEO's pocket. AKO Fraud, Cheating, Lying, Stealing |
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AGGRESSIVE
DRIVING |
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Reckless
driving, Careless driving. |
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CAMPAIGN REFORM |
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Finding a new less visible method for extortion,
theft, and bribery. |
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CUSTOMER SERVICE |
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Look it up on the Internet yourself. |
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DEREGULATION |
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Any once REGULATED industry that served the ENTIRE nation
efficiently and inexpensively for many years, that through much
"Soft Money" got the rules changed to take away all
public control of their needed resource. So that ultimately only a few
remaining companies could make HUGE Profits and give you ZERO (0) service.
Examples are Airlines, Power Companies, Gas (natural)
Companies, and Telephone Companies, |
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DETAINEES |
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Hostages |
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DISPOSABLE INCOME |
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The $2.98 you have left in your pocket after you
have paid for TAXES, food and shelter. |
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DOWNSIZE |
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Layoff, Fire, Close plants and offices. |
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ECOLOGY FRIENDLY PACKAGING |
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We changed our package to something that is not as
good, and is substantially cheaper, however we are going to charge
you more and hope to fool you with this expression. |
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EVENT |
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(when used in a medical context) Heart attack or
any other disastrous happening. |
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GENDER |
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Sex (gender used correctly refers to the case of
a verb). |
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GLOBAL ECONOMY |
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The
exporting of all assembly line, factory, and manufacturing jobs to
countries that Do Not have an AAP, ACLU, EPA, IRS, NLRB,
OSHA or over one million lawyers. The normal GLOBAL ECONOMY
wages in these countries is about $00.50 (fifty cents) per
Day. |
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GUIDANCE |
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Orders |
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GUN CONTROL |
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Outlawing all firearms (except for criminals and
politicians) and creating many organizations and bureaucracies to
make a huge profit on it. |
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INNER CITY |
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Ghetto |
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INVEST |
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(When used by politicians) Spend More Money
Needlessly on something that has never and will never work. |
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ISSUE |
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Problem - - Ever notice when somebody is
trying to SELL you something it is never to solve your
"ISSUES" it is to solve your "PROBLEMS". |
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IT (we don’t) DOESN’T SUPPORT THAT |
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Won’t work with what you bought it for, we didn’t
design it right, and we don’t give a shit that it doesn’t work
right. |
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MEDICAL CARE PROVIDER |
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Use to be a doctor (MD) now its usually a long
line and at the end of it there is someone who speaks broken
English or speaks no English at all. |
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MENTALLY CHALLENGED |
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Dumb |
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OFFER |
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When called on the phone (usually at a bad time) and
prefaced with "I’m not selling anything and have a
offer" trying to peddle you something that is junk, over
priced, or a complete sham. |
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OUTPLACEMENT
FIRM |
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Employment Office or Company, Head Hunter. |
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OUTSOURCE |
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Lay a lot of employees off and sub-contract the
job. |
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OVER QUALIFIED |
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We are going to hire a young kid that knows
nothing and also pay him nothing but the law says we can’t tell
you that. |
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PEACE KEEPING MISSION |
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War, U.S. soldiers getting killed in a foreign
nation about something we have no business getting involved in and
masked by the term UN Unilateral Force or some other such crap. |
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PRE-OWNED |
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Used, piece of crap |
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PROCEDURE |
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(when used in a medical context) Operation |
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PROGRAM CARS |
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Used pieces of crap that were rental cars or fleet
vehicles and really got beat around. |
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RECREATIONAL DRUGS |
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Street
drugs, like heroin, cocaine, marijuana, all of which are
ILLEGAL. However since many politicians and prominent public
figures have been caught using them, they have become
"Recreational Drugs". |
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REINVENT |
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Renaming something that is old and trying to pass
it off as a new item or idea. |
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SALES ASSOCIATE |
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Clerk, Cashier, or Stock Boy who usually knows or
does nothing. |
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SALES ENGINEER |
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Peddler |
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SIGNIFICANT OTHER |
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Girl you are shacking up with (if you are a female
Hunk you are living with). |
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SOFT MONEY |
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Legal bribes, however may only be given to
politicians. |
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SPIN DOCTOR |
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Highly
paid liar, usually found in the employ of politicians or
government |
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SUPPORT |
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The place on the internet you go to try to find a
fix for our faulty product you were fool enough to buy. |
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TECHNICIAN |
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Applies to someone who can only sweep the floor,
or
to
a person that can fix a rocket ship. |
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UNDER SERVICED AREAS |
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Ghetto |
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UNDOCUMENTED
WORKERS |
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Illegal
Aliens |
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USER FRIENDLY |
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Might work, without having to hire an engineer. |
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VALUE |
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An over inflated price placed on an item to make
you think you are getting a bargain. MSRP has the same meaning. |
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WORK AROUND |
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A bailing wire,
Hammer, Rubber Band & Scotch Tape method of trying to make something
work that was designed wrong in the first place, and should not have
been advertised as working or even sold as a finished product.
A synonym for the product that had to use a "Work Around" is JUNK. |
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The defecation is about to
hit the rotary oscillator |
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The Shit Hit the Fan |