Piano Howlers

# 1

This is a true story. The names of the innocent, and the guilty, have not been changed. They've been forgotten.

 

Anyway, some years ago a professional man (a medical specialist, living in Peppermint Grove, an expensive suburb in Western Australia) brought along his young son, maybe 9 years old, for piano lessons. But they didn't have a piano, just a keyboard. Well, in those days I was a bit dogmatic about keyboards---I didn't want to teach him unless he had a real piano. I suppose I must have been a bit short of cash, because I was persuaded to take him on.  

 

The weeks went by, and this youngster was not making any progress. Though I tried everything I knew, he wasn't getting anywhere. It was frustrating for all concerned, and only reinforced my belief that you can't learn piano with a keyboard. (But see elsewhere about learning with keyboards.)

 

A few months later I was deprived of the use of my piano for a couple of weeks when it went away for repairs. This meant I had to teach my students in their own homes.

 

Visiting all my students' houses was a very good thing. It was amazing to see the conditions under which some of them were struggling. Several had the piano right next to the television (you can just imagine how well that would work), or in the living or dining rooms, where the whole household would congregate.

 

But the best one of the lot was the house of the 9 year old. I walked in and exchanged greetings. "Where's the piano", said I. "In here", said the boy. I went through a side door into a small, dimly-lit room, and looked around the four bare walls for the keyboard. There was none. All I could see was a table, a chair, and a computer. So I said "I can't see your keyboard. Can you bring it in? Or is it under the table?" "No," said the budding maestro, "that's it there". I was puzzled. Then I looked more closely at the scene. There was a music programme on the computer. He had been practising his scales and pieces on the function keys at the top of the computer keyboard !

But some medical people REALLY ARE intelligent, and musical. I know because I've taught a lot of doctors to play or sing.

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