Grief Info

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0><script type="text/javascript" src="http://hb.lycos.com/hb.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript" src="http://ratings.lycos.com/ratings/lycosRating.js.php"></script> <script type="text/javascript"><![CDATA[//><!]]></script> <script type="text/javascript" src="http://scripts.lycos.com/catman/init.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript" src="http://members.tripod.com/adm/ad/code-start.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript" src="http://members.tripod.com/adm/ad/code-middle.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript" src="http://members.tripod.com/adm/ad/code-end.js"></script> <noscript> <img src="http://members.tripod.com/adm/img/common/ot_noscript.gif?rand=204928" alt="" width="1" height="1" />  <iframe frameborder="0" marginwidth="0" marginheight="0" scrolling="no" width="728" height="90" src="http://ad.yieldmanager.com/st?ad_type=iframe&ad_size=728x90&section=209094"></iframe>  </noscript> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0><tr> <td valign="top" colspan=2 height=110 BGCOLOR="#CCFFFF" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="041506e1egerbq.jpg"> <div> <FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#339900" FACE="Arial" ><B>Our Hearts Haven on the Web</b></FONT><B> </b><B> </b><B> </b><B> </b><B> </b><B>|    </b><B> </b><A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Our Hearts Haven on the Web"><U><B>home</b></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id17.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Schedule"><U>Schedule</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id18.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Mission"><U>Mission</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id19.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Contacting Our Hearts Haven"><U>Contacting Our Hearts Haven</U></A>   |   Grief  Info   |   <A HREF="id21.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Other Recommended Sites"><U>Other Recommended Sites</U></A></div> <div> </div> </td> </tr><tr> <td valign="top" width=190 BGCOLOR="#339900" TEXT="#080000"> <bR> </td> <td valign="top" height=370 BGCOLOR="#99CC00" TEXT="#080000"> <div> Grief  Info</div> <div> Sudden death sweeps into our lives with a force unequal to most emotional events we will ever encounter.  It creates an instant realization that "life is fragile."  Nothing can prepare us for this tragic moment.   </div> <bR> <bR> <div> We enter a period of great transformation in our lives.  We think about things we never thought about before.  We imagine futures quite different that those we once dreamed about. We often question the past knowing we will not get the answers we feel we need to know.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> The process of getting through may take years and a great deal of personal grief work in healing our pain.  It is natural to doubt ourselves,  to doubt our strength and courage to deal with hard times and difficult choices.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> Together,  we can share our experiences of our unwelcome journey so that we may once again find the "well of hope" that provides peace in our lives.</div> <bR> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> <B>TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF</b></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">Give yourself permission,  time and space to grieve.</b></div> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">Don’t judge your level of grief and healing by how others think you should,  but by your own internal awareness.</b></div> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">Understand and accept your limitations.</b></div> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">Respect the grieving method and timetable of your spouse.  Children also have a unique way of grieving.</b></div> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">Don’t escape into loneliness.</b></div> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">Avoid imagined guilt and "if onlys."</b></div> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">Laughter doesn’t mean you are being disrespectful to your child’s memory.</b></div> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">Postpone major decisions such as selling your home or changing jobs.</b></div> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">The decision to have or not to have another child is yours alone.</b></div> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">Avoid masking the pain with drugs or alcohol.</b></div> <div> <B><IMG BORDER="0" SRC="Symb075c00b7016800000000.gif" HEIGHT="24" WIDTH="24" ALIGN="bottom" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0">Consider participation in support groups;  grief shared can be grief diminished.  Doing this does not make you weak,  inadequate,  or crazy.</b></div> <bR> <bR> <div> The death of an infant is a very traumatic event.  You may have emotions surface that are puzzling to you.  It is important that you know all of the emotions you may be feeling are normal.  It is also important for you to reach out to friends and family.</div> <bR> <div> <B> <script language=JavaScript>  </script>  </b></div> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>