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Enlightenment Questions - Question From Xi
I have a few questions hope you can help.
1) I am always not quite understand what people are saying and do not know how to initiate an interesting conversation. It was not a big problem until recently I move out of my homecountry to study here I found that not only my language is sluggish my courage to speak also shrinks dramatically, which caused me much pain in daily life. Can you tell me what caused that and more importantly how to work it out ?
2) How to control myself against self undoing? Again after attending the new school, I eat too much or skip courses because of sadness and restlessness. I know I worried too much about tiny things but instead of address them directly I am further destroying my life. How can I stop that ?
Answer From Tathagata
Dear Xi Yang,
We need a standard for belief in other's words. The standard means what principle does the words have and if the principle is explained properly or not.
What happens between you and others can have the various causes. During I listen to your mail I can perceive that some serious problems start to work in your organ of consciousness. However, I need more concrete facts and cases to diagnose and to heal you.
Don't be worry too much. It can be solved.
Further response from Xi,
Thank you for your mail. There's one thing I can not understand what is organ of consciousness? If I go to the hospital which department should I attend?
I am afraid I have to leave school because of poor academic performance this semester. Here is the details: in the beginning of the semester I worked hard on the classes. I spend my whole day to study and in order to finish my appoinments I have to stay up late, which weakened my health too. But I still cannot do well so I felt very frustrated and began to skip classes and refused to do my work but indulged in leisureness and still stayed up late so my health did not improve at the cost of doing nothing constructively. And my self control seems totally lost. Last night I made up my mind to go to the lecture this morning but I slept over the time gain. So far I have skipped one week of classes in a row and homeworks were piling up but I am even not trying to get these done, thinking that is too difficult for me and giving up instead of trying to figure it out or getting help from professors and classmates. I reread my question to you two months ago and find myself was eager to solve the problem but now I have become worse than ever. I don't want to fail the courses and be sent home. I am destroying my future. I felt darkness, including unemployment, poverty, loneliness and irrespectful is pending on me. How can I solve these problems? What can I do?