"Boy talk about bein' on your feet all day", he said to himself.
"Cats", thought Scooter, Who needs 'em?
Darn, if I had half the life 'Muffin' the cat has, I'd be one spoiled pooch.
Everytime I see her it just makes me want to tear down the street after her growling.
For once though, I kinda wish my canine instincts hadn't gotten me into so much trouble.
Glancing over into her yard early this afternoon, I saw she had her favorite 'cat-nip' ball.
Hee Hee Hee... It was just like me to want to cause trouble.
Jumping down the front porch steps, I snuck into her yard and grabbed the cat-nip ball.
Kicking up dirt as I sped out of her yard, along with the ball, I suddely skidded to a stop as I saw what stood before me.
Looking up, I saw white teeth flashing right in my face, along with a blood-curdling snarl.
My own growl seemed like a puppy's compared to Butch the Doberman's, who happend to be standing right infront of me.
Now, under normal cirumstances I would't be that worried, seeing as I never had a problem with Butch before, but just last week I stole one of his chewtoys so I guess he has a 'bone' to pick with me.
"Ok" I thought, "just walk on by, and you'll be alright".
"Please" I said to myself, "just let him go away."
Quickly I walked away from him before he made 'kibble' out of me.
Running around the corner, I suddenly saw something that made me wish I was back with Butch.
She was called 'Tina', a.k.a. "The Five Year Old of Death".
The little brat came running towards me, holding a large pink boy, and squealing my name..."SCOOTER!", "SCOOTER!".
Understanding why I was not looking forward to seeing her was easy, seeing as she caused me to lose my social standings in the dog world.
Vanity is one thing when you're a girl, but when you're made to wear a big pink bow and your a guy, it's extrememly humiliating.
Waiting patiently for her to come close, I quickl thought how I'd make my escape.
'X-citedly' I lept to my feet when she ran up to me; I knocked her down in the rocess and ran away leaving her literally in the dust.
Yawning fromthe exhausting activities that had taken place the whole day, I sarted thinking, I should probably get home.
Zooming through the streets on my way home to my nice comfy dog-bed and my food bowl, I suddenly realized after all this time, I still had the cat-nip ball.
After taking the long way around the neighborhood(to avoid Butch and Tina) I finally made it home.
Before going inside my doghouse, I walked over to Muffin's yard and set her cat-nip ball down on the lawn(For those of you who thought that was a rather dumb action, it was because if I were to keep it, I would't have anything to try to steal from Muffin tomorrow-I always plan ahead.)
"Can a dog's life possibly get any better than annoying a cat, and running scared from an irritating little girl and the neighborhood bully who in my case is a dog twice my size"?
Don't ask because if it can, I wouldn't know, seeing as I'm very content with my what some people would call "easy doggy life".
Every day's an adventure when you're a dog even f it might not be that g-r-r-reat of one.
"Sit. No. Sit. No, Sit."
"No! SIT! Like this"
I watched the girl perform a simple task. "Sitting" I believe is the term those humans use.
"ARG! MOM! This dog is so dumb."
"WOOF! WOOF!"
"Patience is a virtue." another voice came from the other room. The Humans mother, a sweet lady, but has an insane obsession of me using the bathroom...OUTSIDE!!! I just can't believe it. Silly Humans.
The human girl rolls her eyes. Looks at the doorway from which the voice came and then looked back at me. She reached behind my head and patted the back of my neck.
"Sit!"
A feeble attempt to push my behind on the ground.
"Woof!" I let out an irritated and confused bark.
After about a teedious 25 minutes of this "sitting" concept the girl became fed up and stomped out of the room
HAHA! I thought to myself. My plans of dominating this household can resume. I wandered over to my poor excuse for a bed, a rug, cautiously and naturally.
I stepped on my bone, an actual trigger that opened a door to a secret room. The door slid open, I looked around and began to make my way through the entrance. Suddenly a sound! Almost a pop, then another pop, then hundreds of litle pops! Then a smell! I searched my memoryto match the sound and smell. I then narowed it down to the following: Poop, nope that's not it. Firecrackers?, no, too quiet. And then it hit me...BACON!!!!
Well I suppose the plot to take overr this household will have to wait!!
