The Hardy's Become HomeLess.

"Now Frank, obey your mother." Fenton Hardy said hoarsely, blood dripping from his flaring nostrils. "Tinky dad, I can't wait to see are new home," Frank Hardy said jovially, black snot running down his face, "I'm sure it'll be very dandy." Fenton Hardy, also known as 'Funnyman Fenton' had decided to move his family, which consisted of Laura Hardy, his wife, and there two sons' Frank and Joe Hardy, to a new home in downtown New York for the family was financially embarrassed. "So Joe," Funnyman asked, "How are you taking this?." "Oh pappy!, it's grand. Were making a fresh start at things!." Joe cried, his greenish skin flush with enthusiasm. "Well son, I'm sorry to say this, but were not exactly making a 'fresh' start, more like a dirty and smelly start." Fenton said this with his long rubbery neck angled downward, like a vulture. "What do you mean Fenton," Laura asked, obviously shocked, "Where are we moving?." "I'm sorry to say this gang, but, well, to put it bluntly, were moving into a refrigerator box." This was all that was said during the long walk to New York City, for Fenton couldn't afford to pay a taxi car to transport his family and there meager belongings.

When the family finally arrived to a more lower class section of New York, Frank broke the silence. "Dad, are we gonna become homeless people?." "Yes son, we are." "But dad, how are we going to eat?," Frank grew pale, his excitement plummeted to the depths, "And potty?." "There's ways." Fenton replied as he began scouting the underside of a small cement bridge for a place to erect the flimsy refrigerator box. "Well gang, here we are, home at last!," Fenton said, swooping his hand at the crude box as if he were displaying a wedding cake for the first time. "This is home?" Joe muttered under his breathe, disgusted at the thought of living in such a grotesque environment. "Yes, until we get back on are feet, it sure is." Fenton said proudly.

The family slept well that night, and the next morning everyone was cheerful and encouraging. "C'mere Frank, I want you come on down to the Army Surplus store with me to buy a few things," Fenton asked, "Don't worry Laura, me and Frank well be back in time for are morning swim." Fenton and Frank strolled the few blocks to the Army Surplus. "Hey pappy, look, over there, I want a new pair of Tommy Jeans" Frank asked, pointing across the street to a Nordstrom store. "Frank, I'll buy you some clothing in this store," Fenton said, opening the door to the Army Surplus store and strolling in. Frank quickly followed his Father in to the dark store. Fenton walked the lanes of used army fatigues for some time until he walked up to the cashier with his arms full of fatigued clothing. "I'll take' em all," he mumbled behind his full arms, "I'll give ya one buck." "Nope, I'll say them for ten bucks and that's all." Replied the cashier. "I ain't got ten bucks, I only got five." Fenton responded angrily. "Okay, deal. Take 'em and go." "Frank, take out my wallet and give this man five bucks." Fenton asked. Frank walked over to his father and slipped a paper wallet from his pair of spandex biking shorts. He thumbed through the cheap wallet until he found a five dollar bill smashed between two ten dollar bills. He then handed it to the smelly cashier. "Tinky." The man mumbled.

Soon Fenton and Frank were strolling back to there box. "Now Frank, did you learn anything in there from your pappy?." Fenton belched. "Yes dad," Frank responded, "How to rip someone off." "Good." Was all Fenton said. When the two Hardy's got home, they found Joe and Laura precipitating in a dumpster-dive with some neighbors. "Having fun?" Fenton asked. "Oh yes!," Laura cried, "I never dreamed it would be such fun!." Fenton handed out the fatigues, and the Hardy family briskly dressed there part. "Well, now were really homeless" Frank shouted happily. "And proud of it!!." Joe added.


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