The Hardy's New Friend

"So, Frank, what say we go do a little trike riding downtown?" Joe Hardy rived, as he stoked the piping fire in the Hardy's fireplace. "Smooth" Frank said adjusting his cuddle wrap while balancing a mug of hot cider on his head. The Hardys were minding the house while Fenton and Laura were vacationing on Catalina island in California. "Say, how'bout we ring the rest of the gang and see if they'd like to tag along?." Joe proposed. "Smooth" Frank replied, slurping his cider. Joe began his slow ascent up from a worn lawn chair. Once he reached his full height of four feet, he began shuffling into the Hardy's kitchen to ring the Hardys friends. "Hey Frank, you got that new fella's number, you know, that dude we met last night at the movies?." Joe shouted. "Aw just a sec, let me mosey on up to my bedroom and check" Frank belched as he slipped into his chukkas and tightened his cuddle wrap. "Well hurry, we don't have all day." Joe bonged.

Frank charged upstairs and into his musty bedroom, where he found a small piece of paper on his floor. "Found it!!." He screamed back to Joe. "Sure go." Joe screamed back. Frank picked up the speed and charged back downstairs, but on his way, he slipped on a magazine that was laying on the stairs. "Who-ha!!." Frank shouted as he fell backwards on the stairs, and tumbled to the bottom. "What say!!." Joe burst as he ran to see what had caused the hurly-burly. He found Frank lying at the bottom of the stairs, with a Cabela's magazine ripped up by his side. "Oh, here you are Joe." Frank murmured, lifting up his bony arm to hand Joe the phone-number that was scrawled on the piece of paper. "Thanks Frank." Joe ran back into the Hardy's kitchen to resume his phone calls.

Joe returned to the living room a few minutes later to relay the results of his phone calls. "Okay Frank, she's all done. Chet, Biff, Phil, and the newbie fella, what's his name?, oh, yes, Euro, are all going to meet us at Mr. Pizza at two'o clock." "Smooth." Frank replied, snuggling up in his cuddle wrap, and laying back down in front of the fire. "You'd better hurry, it's one right now." Joe probed. "FRANK!!." Joe screeched. It was no use, Frank had fallen asleep. Joe reached for the fire tongs and approached Frank from behind. SNAP! Joe closed the tongs on Frank's monkey ear. "Ouch!!." Frank yelled in affliction. "Ma ha!." Joe cried, skipping around the living room, slapping his thighs. "Alright, I'm coming." Frank whined, as he rolled over and slipped off his cuddle wrap. "Joe," Frank whipper-snappled, "Fetch me that pair of freshly pressed chino's from my bedroom." "Sure go." Joe gawked.

After Frank had changed from his cuddle wrap into a pressed pair of chino's and chukka's, the boys' headed out to the Hardys frontyard to mount there tricycles. "Well, let's go!" Joe cried as he began pedaling down the street. "I'll say!." Frank slurred.

Soon Mr. Pizza came into view. "Looks like the gang beat us to the punch." Joe mused. "I'll say, and look, ain't that Euro's bike?" Frank mud-caked. "Sure is, he told us yesterday he owns a Kona Stab." Joe said in awe. "Smooth" the Hardys said in unison. The Hardy's parked there trikes, and strolled into Mr. Pizza. "Hey, it's the Hardys!!." Tony Prito, the Hardy's chum and a Mr. Pizza worker, greeted the boys'. Frank smiled. "So, 'sup?." "Nothing much. What's going on with you fellers?." Tony asked while covering a pizza with olives, the color of his skin. "Oh, me and Joe just came down to meet some buddies and have a pizza." Frank replied, scanning the dark restaurant for his chums. He soon spotted them in a far corner. Chet waved Frank and Joe over. "Say, you guys game for joining Euro's club?." Chet asked. Joe glanced at Euro, who had a red mohawk and five earrings in one ear. "Sure." Joe shrugged, feeling uneasy. "Hey Euro, tell the Hardy's a little about your club." Biff suggested. "Okay," Euro began, his raspy voice ringing throughout the restaurant. "I started my club'bout two years ago. It's called the "Weirdo's". To join, yas gostas get a mohawk, like me. And a leather jacket. And five earrings in at least your ear, which shouldn't be a problem for you fellas since you got such fat ears." "So, all we gostas do is polish ourselves up a bit and were in?" Joe quizzed. "Yeah, and you've gotta act weird." Euro added. "Smooth" the Hardys said in unison. "Okay guys, meet me tomorrow at 1:00 pm at that Hippie store just off the end of Shore Road." Euro said, getting up from the table. "Sure go" the Hardys cooed.

The next day the Hardy's strolled up to the Hippie Store at the decided time. The Hardys waited five minutes. "Say, Frank, do you think Euro pulled are fingers?" Joe asked. "Maybe." Frank agreed. Just then a black sedan pulled up the gravel drive. "That's him. His license plate says "WEIRDO", this should be smooth." Frank said, running his hand over the top of his new mohawk. The car door creaked open and Euro stepped out. "Nice day, eh boys?," he quipped. "Sure" Joe weaseled. "You ready?" Euro asked. "I guess" Frank responded, running the back of his wiry hand over his runny nose. "Okay. Get in." Euro said opening up the left backdoor of the sedan. The Hardy's obeyed, and slipped into the dark, smoky interior. The door shut, and the interior of the sedan was flooded with darkness. "Say, Frank, the windows are painted black." Joe observed. "Yeah, so?." "Oh, I dunno." Joe responded as the engine roared to life. Joe felt the car pull out onto the Shore Road, and then pick up speed.

The car stopped ten minutes later. The boys' heard voices outside. Then Euro opened the car door, letting the Hardy's out. Frank noted the location as being a forest. "Get'em boys!!" Euro whooped. Five teens erupted from nearby bushes, wielding whips and paddles. They approached Frank and Joe. "I'll say were in a cucumber!!" Joe cried. "I'll say!" Frank screamed. One of the teens began whipping Joe, while another paddled Frank's rear-end. The abuse continued for many minutes, until Euro called the teens off. "Enough. Let's tie'em up and get." The teens swiftly bound the Hardys to some sturdy pine trees. Then they piled into the sedan and drove off. "Boy, wonder what well become of us. Those teens sure gave us a licking." Frank grouched. "I'll say." Joe replied. Just then the boys heard a growl. "Say, wonder what that is?" Frank wondered aloud. "Probably just a bear." Joe replied. A bush near the boys began to shake, and all at once a huge Grizzly bear charged out, aiming it's deadly jaws for Frank's scrawny neck. "Help!!" the boys cried. The massive beast inched closer to Frank until it was within biting range. CRUNCH! the bear closed it's jaws around Frank's neck, blood splurged everywhere. The bear released his death bite on Frank's neck and repeated it on Joe. Both boys were dead within seconds.


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