HOW TO SPOT AN EMOTIONAL HIGH RISK
No relationship is normal. But there comes a point where you may look at the one
you're with, and ask yourself how you managed to become an unwilling eyewitness to their
hellhole of a psyche. Thankfully, there are ways to tell if your partner will come
with a lot of baggage (or, if you're too much of a mess yourself).
Who Are The High-Risk People?
The high-risk people are the ones who will scream, cry, crush your ego, and
basically yank your emotional chain until it snaps off. You know there'll be
problems ahead when your partner seems to fall into one of these categories:
Needy
Getting into relationships for the sole purpose of having someone to stroke
and console their inner child, the needy person seems cute at first. Who doesn't
like having their partner hang on them or get jealous once in a while?
Early warning sighs: You go visit them, and they won't let you go home. They call
you at work because they miss you, when you've only been dating a few weeks.
What you can look forward to: A couple of years down the road finds you either
sulking in a pit of silent frustration (after all, you only see your friends and family on
holidays) or completely broken mentally. Inevitable, this is now someone who has
moved into your residence without your consent.
Schizo
You never know how to please this one. One minute they're angry, the next minute
they're begging you for forgiveness. These people usually have some kind of
beef-their ex treated them like crap, their mother beat them-and they want to take it out
on you. However, since it's important for you to stick around, they'll still have
their moments of compassion.
Early warning signs: Bawls you out in public (or does something just as dramatic)
then profusely apologizes afterward. Goes through friends fast.
What you can look forward to: Years of misery unless you speak up. Why
would they leave someone who puts up with them as well as you do?
Nonexistent
Do you have a relationship with this person? Who knows? They never call, and
if they spend the night, they're gone by morning. Even after listening to several
Mars/Venus tapes together, your silent lover still refuses to communicate. But the
sex can be outstanding.
Early warning signs: Needs a lot of "alone" time. Can seem mad, but
insists everything's fine when you question them.
What you can look forward to: All the drawbacks of a relationship but few of the
benefits. In other words, you're committed, but the person's not making it worth
your while.
Shady
Charming to the hilt, it's almost impossible not get sucked in by the shady one, at least
for a time. After all, you were promised the world.
Early warning signs: Has connections with tons of people, and can "hook you
up" with free stuff. Can talk their way into any establishment. Supposedly has
a decent job, but sometimes needs a loan or a ride home from work.
What you can look forward to: You'll go broke or get cheated on as a direct result
of buying into you lover's hype-but you'll beg them to stay with you anyway since they're
devastatingly good-looking.
While it's scary to realize that your partner is a high risk, it's also important to note
that the less healthy you are yourself, the more likely it is that your relationship with
them will work in an ironic and parasitical way.
Cheers.
