SINÉAD O’CONNOR:
“I would kill myself if I was an ordinary person!”

What do you think about the people who describe you as a headache?
I’m not angry with them; besides, I respect them. Because, at least, they’re using thier right to protest; they’re showing the courage to oppose something. The people who think that I’m a troubled person, in fact are not those who I see as a problem and against whom I’m fighting. It’s strange, those who I want to crucify have prefered to keep silent or stay away from me so far.

Who do you mean? The Pope?
Who I mean are the liars, those who kill the freedom of speech, those who try to control our lives; but most of all those who abuse children and those who shut their eyes to this. I’m not against The Pope. He’s only a symbol. I’m against the institution which he represents. The source of all evil; in other words the Catholic Church.

Had you planned beforehand what you did in the TV show Saturday Night Live?
While I was sitting in the backstage before the show, I was listening to Bob Marley in my walkman and thinking that how absurd my planned role was. Then all of a sudden I changed my mind, it wouldn’t have gained anyone anything if I had done what I was asked for during the rehearsals. I was supposed to sing Scarlet Ribbons from my new album and meanwhile hold a picture of starving African children towards the camera. Everyone already knew these facts. I wanted to draw people’s attention to the reason, not to the results. So I sang Bob Marley and ripped the picture of The Pope.

What about what you did during the Bob Dylan tribute concert in New York Medison Square Garden?
According to the schedule, I was going to sing Dylan’s I Believe In You. If I had told that I wanted to sing Marley’s War again, I would have been most certainly rejected. I did what I felt like doing and I did what I thought was right.

But you got booed...
There were twenty thousand people in the hall and more than half was enjoying themselves. I amazed them, and they booed me. It’s nothing to spend a lot of time thinking about because the American are touchy more than necessary.

What was Bob Dylan’s response to what you did?
We never talked about it. He musn’t have been pleased with it, of course. If I had done what I was told, now I would regret it. I don’t care about what Dylan thinks. Dylan has done nothing so far but to deceive people who believe in him.

If you think that way, then why did you take place in that concert?
I had to take advantage of every opportunity to have my voice heard. Don’t you think it’s enough reason?

Have you ever wanted to live like an ordinary person?
Ordinary people live with fake truths. I could never bear this and I would kill myself if I had to. In their little lives customized truths are dominant. If I had to spend my all day opposite the television watching to MTV or if I had to have sex with my husband whenever he wanted to, the last thing I would like to do would certainly be living.

Why are you against MTV this much?
I will not give up repeating until it comes true: MTV must be closed down! Becaus MTV is blinding our eyes, it is taking us away from the things we have to see. MTV itself is solely responsible for why we have become a stranger to art, poetry, theatre and all other beautiful things. The images change so quickly that you even don’t have the time to stop and think. This nonsense which has no use but to break off the tie between our brains and hearts must end at once!

Nothing Compares 2 U is still one of MTV’s most aired videos...
Damn it! I don’t want to talk about this subject anymore.

Do you think today’s Sinéad has to do with what she went through as a child?
Probably. But it’s my mother to hold responsible for everything. She was an unhappy and menatlly ill person. She was very cruel; but the worst of all was there was no one to help her. She always told me that sex was a disgusting thing and that I should never do it. Even my breating was enough reason fo her to beat me up. Sometimes she used to chain me up and send to the garden, and I would spend the night outside. She died in a car crash in 1985. I had seen the night before that my mother would die.

How’s your own relation with your son?
Full of love. My biggest fear is to hurt Jake. And my biggest responsibility is to raise him as a conscious person with self respect.

What could be your expectations from music from now on?
Nothing. The boss of my record company still thinks that return to the industry. Excluding very special occassions and very special purposes, I will never enter to the studio nor give concerts again. I don’t even want to touch a single penny to come from the companies’ safes. Music was a good means to have my voice heard. I could only carry out the mission which God has given me through music. It’s not of much importance whether people listen to me or whether they care about what I say. What’s important is that I have kept my promise to God.

Why do you think you have disappointed people?
In the first place, because I am a woman. If I was a man and if I had done the same things, again I wouldn’t have been taken seriously but I wouldn’t have met such reaction, neither. The second reason is my appearance. I don’t have vision of a reliable woman. A shaved head, careless clothes and such... They can’t put me into a category and this is driving them crazy.  People are afraid to listen to me because I’m telling things they don’t want to hear. Now I only want everyone to know that as a person full of love, not hatred, I only belive in God and in rightness of what I’m trying to do.

Taken from an issue of the Turkish music mag, Blue Jean circa 1992.
Translated from Turkish by Deniz Cebe.