Copyright 1999 MGN Ltd. The Mirror April 16, 1999, Friday I TORE UP PICTURES OF THE POPE, BUT NOW I WANT TO BE A PRIEST; EXCLUSIVE: SINEAD O'CONNOR REVEALS CAREER MOVE THAT WILL TRANSFORM HER FROM ROCK REBEL TO MOTHER BERNADETTE Neil Michael SHE stunned the world seven years ago by ripping up a picture of the Pope live on American TV as millions watched. But last night Sinead O'Connor warned: "The s**t is going to hit the fan again." The 32-year-old singer has revealed she is to be ordained as a priest. After more than a year of secret meetings with a rebel French bishop, she is to take up what she says has been a life-long calling and become Mother Bernadette O'Connor. "I know I will be attacked and ridiculed for doing this," she said at her North London home, "but I don't care. Why shouldn't women be ordained as priests? "This inot an act of disrespect. Far from it. This is my message for the millennium and I hope it will attract other men and women to the priesthood. "I don't intend making a song and dance about it or end up parading about in priestly robes. "I've always had a strong calling but until only recently there has never been an opening for me and other women." O'Connor is genuinely excited at the prospect of receiving Holy Orders. She has been told she will have special responsibilities to the dying. The venture appears to offer new hope in a life blighted by a period of child abuse, severe depression and at least two attempted suicides. "This is not a gimmick, this is me, this is what I want to do," she said. "I've no doubt it will cause an uproar, just like the time I ripped up the picture of the Pope. "Although people would not believe it then and probably find it hard to believe now, that was actually an act of love and respect. "I imagine he goes through phases when he probably wants to rip up his own image. If we ever met he would probably like me. "My ordination, which will be a private affair, will help change the Church for the better. "Just because I'm a woman I don't see why I shouldn't be able to administer Last Rites. "I also don't see why I shouldn't hear confessions and do weddings." She admitted that accepting the sacraments and the commandments would mean her having to modify her behaviour. But she added: "I've been doing that anyway." AFTER a number of relationships, she does not want to repeat the mistakes she made in the past. Rock musician John Reynolds, the father of her 11-year-old son Jake, was one of her first loves. She was just 18 at the time, had landed a record deal and was developing a reputation for being outspoken, feisty and provocative. Reynolds was the drummer on her first album, The Lion and The Cobra, which gave her her first top 20 hit, Mandika. Jake was born in 1987 and the couple married in 1989 but separated soon afterwards. They remain close friends. She met three-year-old Roisin's father John Waters, the Irish Times journalist, in 1995 but they split up when she was just eight weeks pregnant. Since then, O'Connor's dates have included leading record producer Adrian Sherwood. Previously there was guitarist John Robertson. Her views on marriage and relationships have changed dramatically. "Ultimately, yes I would like to get married," she said, "but next time round I think I'd want to know the man for at least five or six years. "I also think I would wait a lot longer, say at least six months, before I'd sleep with him. "It would be another few years before I would think of living with him. "But I don't want more kids. I wouldn't for the sake of both Jake and Roisin." She added: "I think I ended up sleeping with a number of people I shouldn't have because I was looking for love. "But because I tend to be quite a vulnerable person I have found myself manipulated into situations that I really shouldn't have been in. "Basically, I don't think I enjoy having a boyfriend as such. I don't want to have to constantly explain to somebody else where I'm going or what I'm doing. "And I certainly don't want someone having a go at me because I haven't ironed their shirt properly or done the dishes." Becoming a priest will, she insisted, emphasise the importance of not sleeping around or being "adulterous". It's a marked change for someone who once admitted she was more suited to being a mistress than a wife. "I certainly won't be giving up my sexuality," she said. "The Church will have to move with the times. I think that both male and female priests should be able to take lovers and have children." Her ordination, which is set to rock the Catholic Church, is due to take place later this year at a secret location in France. Only a small group of friends will be invited. O'Connor said: "I've been meeting this bishop in France for a year. I only found out a few days ago that he has agreed to do the ceremony. "He wanted to know if I was serious about this and he is now satisfied that I am. "But before this ordination happens, and for a number of years afterwards, I will still have a lot of studying to do." O'Connor's appearance at last week's Linda McCartney tribute gig - which will be shown on BBC1 on Sunday at 10.30pm - was savaged by a number of London critics. SHE was accused of staying on stage too long and was slammed for suggesting that former Crowded House singer Neil Finn's wife was sleeping around behind his back. "I was also accused of looking dazed and confused," she said, "but there's no crime against that. I did what I was supposed to do, which was to sing two beautiful songs like an angel. "I didn't stay on stage longer than I should have because, in fact, I was told to stay on and Neil Finn knew I was only joking because we had been larking around together that afternoon. "Any one of the top names on the bill who was supposedly hurt by my actions has been really, really supportive to me since that night. "I got a lovely fax from Paul McCartney's people and there were other sweet messages. "But the night wasn't supposed to be about me. The night was about Linda McCartney and animal rights. "I got picked on because I am supposed to be this crazy rock bitch woman who speak her mind. "Sure, I was a bit dazed. How would you feel performing on stage with George Michael, Paul McCartney and Elvis 'sex on legs' Costello? "I'm allowed to be honest with my feelings because that way I've always been able to give an honest and true performance. It's bloody frightening standing up on stage singing in front of a crowd. I'd be lying to you if I said it wasn't. "But in certain circles dishonesty has got me branded an absolute crackpot. "It irritates a number of people that I'm a mainstream artist. They will always have problems coming to terms with that." O'Connor also pointed out she had little sleep before the McCartney concert. "I was exhausted because I'd been travelling back from Europe with my daughter and had gone straight to the gig for rehearsals," she said. "At the end of the day I'm a bit giddy and mischievous in a goofy kind of a way. "Me and the other musicians and performers had a great laugh before the main event. "No matter what anybody says, I am very professional in what I do on stage or in the studio. How I behave otherwise is my business." She added: "What hurts me is the cruelty of being mocked for my affliction and the mockery done to other people who suffer afflictions. I ADMIT I am severely unwell, both emotionally and physically. Sadly, there is an injunction out on me preventing me explaining why. "But one of the first lessons my parents taught me was never to mock the afflicted." O'Connor's ordination is not the only reason she will have to moderate her behaviour. She said: "Having two children around the house means I can't go out and get drunk all the time. And in any case, I hate puking. I like a bit of weed but I rarely go out." Home is the five-bedroomed house in Highgate Hill that she bought a year ago with her then life savings - pounds 935,000. A bright, white detached affair, it sits modestly on a terrace of similar houses with immaculate lawns, flower beds and neat hedges. She moved from near Notting Hill because she wanted to be somewhere "more like Ireland" and because it was safer for her children. A black baby grand piano sits in the study. Her bodyguard stands nearby. The grey and white kitchen is spotless. A wooden cuckoo clock rests halfway down one wall while a small picture of the Virgin Mary hangs on another. O'Connor's Peruvian housekeeper Carmen tends to the chores while Maria, the nanny, can be regularly found squatting on the floor in another room playing with Roisin. Pictures of the little girl and Jake adorn the sitting room's white mantelpiece which has the legend "Faith and courage" painted on the front. Nearby are plants, a canvas by O'Connor's artist sister Eimear and a few bean bags. Colourful African prints hang on the walls, as do other pictures of the Virgin. A two-foot cast of Our Lady also stands at one end of the room. Roisin's latest passion is for singing. Her mother said: "I took her on stage at the rehearsals for the McCartney do. "She had her own radio mike and she loved the feeling of being on stage and singing. "Although it's obvious she's not in any way afraid to compete with me, that's something Jake was wary of. "It's only recently he has started listening to my music and telling me how much he admires me. "The bond I have for Roisin is very similar to the one I have for him. Maybe I am more emotionally ready to be a mother. "I was a child when I had Jake. But at the end of the day, although the feelings I have for both of them can be different they are no less strong. "We're an unconventional family in many respects. If anything, I think we represent a family of the millennium." If either of her children expressed a wish to go into the music business she would not stop them. However, she admitted: "I'm not sure Jake is so keen. He has a brilliant mind and is a beautiful writer but he has told me he would like to be a professional skater and work with children. "Roisin, on the other hand, very obviously loves music - especially reggae, like me." Yesterday, O'Connor looked and acted like any other mother as she helped Jake get ready for a trip into town with two of his friends. As he careered off on his rollerblades she called after him: "Ring me at least once to make sure you're OK. "And for God's sake be careful and don't kill yourself."