Taylor Hanson
Finally, afraid that I was keeping my brothers(who had wordlessly opted to share one of the beds in the room and let me have the other to myself seeing the shape I was in coming out of the dressing room) awake, I quietly got up and padded around the room, trying to find the door to the bathroom. I thought that it might be a safe place to retreat for the night. Alone with my thoughts.
I found the door and my next mission was to find the light. My hand ran over it, turning it on accidentally and I was immediately blinded by its brightness. Quickly covering my eyes with one arm, I closed the door behind me with my free hand.
When I opened my eyes again, I instantly regretted it, for, standing before me was a stranger. His skin was pale from lack of sleep, his cheeks red from all the tossing and turning. Most of his hair flyaway in gravity-defying positions around his head, some of it stuck to it with sweat.
Sighing with defeat, I slid to the floor, out of range of the mirror. I buried my head in my arms, once again trying to force myself not to think about it.
However, it didn't matter how much I didn't want to think about the two people sleeping in the room just a mere thin, hotel wall away from me at this very moment(if they were even asleep). I began to wonder, as I stared at the tiles on the floor, if there was even going to be a mere thin hotel wall separating us after tomorrow when we got to hear what my parents had called "the rest of the story." Truth be told, I didn't particularly want to hear the rest of the story. Just hearing this part of it was hurting me so much.
The image of their expressions as the woman and Parker left the room was recalled to the front of my mind. It was obvious that they didn't really know
what to say to me. I already had a bad feeling I knew what it was going to be, though there was another part of me somewhere that refused to let go of the idea that maybe I was wrong.
Things like that don't happen.
So they said it frankly. Frankly was a bad choice. Frankly felt like a dull knife making its way straight to my heart. Slowly.
"We...um...We aren't...You're adopted, honey."
How can you just say it like that? Just blurt it out? I mean, some little preparation might have helped the slightest bit, could've helped ease the pain that comes with a statement like that. But they just...said it. Just like that. That was it. Cut and dry.
They had been very quick to add all that stuff about how they'll always love me and how I'll always be their son no matter what, but I was too stung to hear any of it. Numbness is the only word to describe what I felt for the first few minutes after that. I wasn't even really aware, at that point, that I was crying.
"Isaac and Zac and the others don't know," my mother had told me, in tears herself. "We're the only ones."
"Parker out there is your twin brother," my father had said.
"So...Is that woman...my mother?" I asked it because I knew that it was the only question running through my head at the time which would be answered with no. No was a comfort.
My mother answered accordingly. She didn't go into any details. It was nothing but stillness after that.
I still couldn't really feel like all this was really happening. It was a dream, I was sure of it. When I woke up, I would be in that coffin-like bed on the tour bus or in some strange hotel bed, or, if I was really lucky, in my own bed, in my own home, with my own siblings, and my own parents.
It took me a few minutes to hear the knocking on the door I was sitting against. Whether it was the loud ringing sounds in my ears of the fact that the sound was very soft, I'm not sure.
"Tay?" Zac's voice came timidly. "You okay in there?"
"Go away," I said without thinking. I almost took it back. Until I realized that I meant what I said.
"Do you want me to get mom or something?" His voice was scared now. It wasn't the first time I had so rudely asked for my privacy, but I imagine that by the way I was acting when we got to the hotel room, he was probably thinking that I was attempting suicide in there. The thought didn't seem so far-fetched to me, though under normal circumstances, it would have been ludicrous.
"No," I said forcefully. Mom. Who was she? "Now go away." I said it calmly, forcing my voice not to raise to unnecessary levels. I just really needed to be alone at that point.
"Okay," he said hestitantly.
I sensed him walk away and a few moments later, someone else walk up to the door. There was a soft knock before Isaac's voice came.
"Tay? Is something wrong?"
Yes, I thought. The question should be, is there something right? Because at that moment, everything seemed wrong.
"Tay? Taylor? Are you okay in there?"
"I just need to be alone for a few minutes," I answered.
"Okay. We'll be out here if you need us," he said, sounding just as hesitant as Zac had but somehow more willing to give me my space. I guess it came from knowing me my whole life.
Strange thought.
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Index
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Fourteen